Being prepared when traveling is essential to a comfortable and organized trip. But sometimes there is a such thing as being “too prepared” and you end up with more baggage than necessary. Here are 15 of the most insane and unnecessary travel accessories that people buy.
Tired of airplane neighbors hogging your space? With this Create-A-Space invention, you’ll be keeping their obnoxious pointy elbows at bay. Just whip out the two boards to latch onto your armrests and create your own personal space. Surely, your neighbor will appreciate the reminder to keep their hands and feet to themselves.
2. Travel Bidet
Be the true inner hippie and environmentalist by proving to your friends that you’re devoted to saving the environment, no matter what–even when you’re traveling. With this eco-friendly travel bidet, you’ll be saving the world–one toilet after another. Now if only you can figure out a solution to your paper boarding passes.
3. Ostrich Pillow
Ever wonder why ostriches truly look rested and have the most energy? Now you can find out for yourself when you buy this exquisite one-of-a-kind ostrich pillow. Designed to isolate yourself in a complete orb of darkness and silence, you’ll be sleeping like a log (or ostrich). Pay no attention to any snickering your way, just remember that they’re only jealous.
4. Deluxe Seatback Organizer
This deluxe seatback organizer will help you utilize your multi-tasking skills in the air. Want to read your mystery romance novel, design a blueprint while putting on makeup? With this seatback organizer, your options will be endless.
5. Female Urination Device
Ladies, are you tired of waiting in long lines for the restroom while you frustratingly watch men zoom in and out within seconds? This female urination device (FUD) will help you decrease your time spent in restrooms. FUDget about the boys, you go girl!
6. B-Tourist Strip
What’s a more perfect way to let your nosy neighbors know how to respect your zone than physically seal yourself off with this reliable B-Tourist strip? Surely, no one will be leaning in to your own personal space and stealing your air when you are in your own personal island.
7. Techno Privacy Scarf
If Tourist B-Strip doesn’t deliver the message to your neighbors of how dire important your privacy is, you can turn to the techno privacy scarf. This knitted accessory will not only keep you warm, but let you isolate yourself with laptop. Your neighbors can struggle at every angle to see what you’re doing and will fail miserably as you chuckle to images of Grumpy Cat glowing on your screen.
8. Plane Sheets
Designed for the Howard Hughes in you, plane sheets are an excellent way to guarantee a germ-free flight. And to top it all off, you can do it with style! Ranging from fashionably-chic leopard spots to camouflage, you can have it all!
9. Travel Snuggie
Never trust a stewardess when she hands you the airline’s blanket and tells you that it’s clean. Whoever heard of a washer and dryer in an airplane? Instead, you should respectfully decline and roll out your own personal travel snuggie. You’ll be toasty warm while other passengers pitifully inhale other’s people dust mites on their blankets.
10. Portable Sauna
Why go to your hotel’s sauna when you can have it in the privacy of your own hotel room? You’ll be living like royalty when you set up this portable sauna to leave you feeling refreshed like a newborn baby. When word gets around the hotel, they’ll come knocking on your door, hoping for a personal invitation to your luxurious set up.
11. Inova’s Motel Room Stain Finder
Never trust a motel when they say your room will be spotless. With this reliable handheld masterpiece, you’ll inspect every nook and cranny for unwanted bodily spillage. Armed with spotty evidence, your motel will surely apologize profusely, refund your money, and beg for forgiveness. With the stain finder, the world will be at your command.
12. GasBgon Anti-Flatulence seat
So a jar of Beano doesn’t quite cut it for you? No worries! GasBgon will purify the stink away and trap every gaseous air to leave your body. The GasBgon seat comes in all sorts of beautiful patterns that will match your personality! As long you don’t let anyone take a whiff of your seat afterwards, you’ll be saved from a lifetime of embarrassment!
13. Upright Sleeper
It’s always embarrassing to doze off only to wake up and realize that not only have you been resting on your neighbor’s shoulder, but you’ve left a pool of saliva on his collar. This fail-safe upright sleeper will help control your dribbling on fellow passengers while helping you maintain the perfect posture. It’s advisable you should wear this all the time anyway, for better posturing. After weeks of wearing this reliable device, you’ll have a steady gait like the Princess of Monaco.
14. Mini Motel
Don’t you hate it when you desperately need to take a nap only to be surrounded by prying eyes and no comfortable place to rest? With this mini motel, not only will you catch up on your beauty rest, but you’ll have total privacy. Not much different than your average tent, the motel is a smart traveling accessory when it comes to being stranded at airports. So purchase this magnificent piece, pitch it next to the waiting-to-board area, and succumb to slumber. Just remember to set your alarm.
15. Inflatable Footrest
Can’t afford first class flying seats? No worries! This inflatable footrest will be the answer to your troubles. You can take out your fold-able ottoman and inflate it while your neighbors in the front of the plane watch you with envy. That’ll show ’em!